I often hear people say, “I’m too old for that.” While I believe that you are never too old to do the things you truly love, I do believe we outgrow certain things as we get older. Many of the things we outgrow are the things that don’t serve us, such as making excuses or keeping quiet for fear that people won’t like what we have to say.
As you know, letting go of the things that don’t serve you can be a huge step toward increased health and vitality. And, if you have read my book Goddesses Never Age, you know that the key to becoming ageless is not related to the number of years you have lived on this planet—rather it’s about your own wisdom. Wisdom is affected by your own experiences, preferences, and thoughts. You can be wise at any age.
5 Tips for Creating Your New Year, Wise You List
With the new year in full swing, you may have already made your list for what you want to bring into your life. If you haven’t written anything down, I suggest you try it. Writing down your goals forces you to clarify what you want. By the same token, writing down the things you no longer will tolerate in your life—the things you are too wise for—will motivate you to overcome resistance and act toward achieving your goals. Both are necessary.
Since most of us are filled with motivation at the beginning of a new year, now is a great time to make your “Things I Am Too Wise For” list.
Here is how to get started:
- Write it down. When you write down the things you have already let go, you are creating a reminder of how far you have come.
- Add to your list. Once you have reminded yourself of how far you have come, write down the things that you know you are too wise for but haven’t quite put into action yet. Let the action of writing it down move you toward letting go.
- Don’t judge your list. Let your list be as long or a short as you want. No pressure. This is not a one-time to-do list.
- Make it visible. Place your list somewhere you can easily see it. The point is to use it for inspiration.
- Continue to add to your list as you become wiser. This can be both empowering and fun!
Things I am Too Wise For in 2021
I don’t believe in being “age-appropriate.” I believe that aging is optional. There is nothing I am too old for. In fact, as many of you know, I feel younger now than ever! One of the ways I have become younger is by becoming wiser.
By eliminating the things I am too wise for, I have increased my value and my competence. You can too! Here is my list of things I am too wise for:
- Using my age as an excuse. If you have read my book Goddesses Never Age, you’ll notice that I don’t state my age. This is because I have stepped out of the cage of age altogether—I have simply become too wise for ageism. And, as I advise in my book, I don’t think about my age; I don’t celebrate “milestone” birthdays. And, I don’t use my age as an excuse for anything. Instead, I think about taking up space. I feel so strongly that my best years are all ahead.
- Weighing myself every day. Like many women, I spent decades allowing the number on the bathroom scale to determine the quality of my day. I’m now far too wise for that. My weight has been up, and it has been down. Quite frankly, I’ve found that my happiness is an inside job that isn’t related to my weight.
- Withholding my beliefs about my spirituality. I have been known to hold ceremonies and officiate in the way that feels best to me. I call in the Archangels and the 4 Directions. I smudge everyone. I use Divine Love petitions for myself and others. I dance around the fire. I don’t hold back or worry about what others think. The process is about being myself and acting on my true beliefs.
- Being hesitant about my creativity. Everyone is born creative. We all have individual styles, and we express them in a way that no one else can possibly imitate. I have expanded my creativity in many ways over the years—from dancing the tango to “process painting” and more. I found it exhilarating to be in the creative process and allow my inner self to shine through.
- Being a fashionista. Carrie Bradshaw put designer shoes on the map for many women. But even before that, for many years, I felt a little embarrassed wearing my L.L. Bean boots to New York City in the winter. Not anymore! While high-heeled or pointy-toed shoes may look sexy, they throw your body out of alignment. Over time, they contribute to bunions, hammer toes, and foot pain. The truth is, I go barefoot whenever I can. I also wear minimal shoes so that walking is like being barefoot. As a result, I have better arches, stronger feet, and more flexibility than ever.
- Spending time with people who don’t inspire or uplift me. I’m done with putting up with negative people—you know, those people who complain about their spouses, their jobs, their kids, their health, or their families without being able to tap into their power to improve their situations. I am wise enough to love my own company. I no longer need to be with people just so that I won’t be alone. In fact, nothing is lonelier than being with people who drain my energy and have nothing to offer. I love my own company so much that loneliness is a thing of the past. It’s so liberating.
- Being “Appropriate.” I remember that a friend once called me to tell me her daughters told her that they didn’t want to see her dance like she did at a wedding. They were shutting her down by telling her that her exuberant dancing was “inappropriate.” My friend was far from inappropriate. She was just enjoying herself on the dance floor. What she wasn’t doing was being “dignified” and “shut down.” I am no longer dignified and shut down. I used to be. I have the home videos to prove it. But I’m wiser now.
- Finishing a book I don’t like. If I read 30 pages and I don’t like it, I just stop and give the book away. It doesn’t matter if the book is considered a great classic or ingenious. If I don’t like it, it doesn’t warrant my attention. I feel the same way about television shows and movies. If I don’t like them within the first 15 minutes, they are not going to get better. Every single time I’ve stuck it out thinking that the movie simply had to get better, I’ve been disappointed. And it feels like a couple hours of life have been robbed from me.
- Speaking to telemarketers. When the phone rings and I hear that delay on the other end, I simply hang up. Yes, I know that there is a human being on the other end doing his or her job. I bless them first – then I hang up.
- Watching mainstream news. The mainstream media is owned by special interest groups that want to keep us angry, afraid, and unsure. This has been more evident this year, and many people are waking up to this fact. I give my attention to the people, places, and things that are making a positive difference on the planet—not tearing it down.
- Believing I need to save others. As a physician, I was trained to rescue others. And believe me, when someone is bleeding or in pain, the tools of medicine are wonderful and amazing. But I have learned that I can sometimes go too far with my rescuer mind-set and that it can even disempower the very people I try to help. So, I simply acknowledge that I am not anyone else’s Higher Power. They have their own. Now I am able to offer information and allow people to find their own answers without thinking that I know what’s best for them.
- Caring what others think. I’ve been an outlier most of my life—in medicine, in college, in my town, in life in general. When one of my daughters was about 7 years old, she asked me if I was a doctor. I said, “Yes, I’m a doctor.” She said, “Well, you’re not what you’d expect.” She was right! I’ve never been what people expect. I don’t fit into any one group. Though I can merge into almost all of them, I no longer try to be someone I am not.
- Holding on to guilt and shame. Guilt and shame are feelings associated with self-sacrifice and martyrdom, which are tools of darkness and enslavement. They dim your light and perpetuate the myth that you are flawed. When you love yourself first, you stand as the light. I choose to humbly acknowledge my greatness with humility and shine my light.
What are you too wise for? Please share your wisdom with me in the comments section below.