As we transition from summer to fall, many women feel overwhelmed by fall’s demands. Typically, there is a new schedule to adopt, perhaps because school has started or because traffic patterns have changed. Often, you notice an increased demand at work, as people return from vacation focused on completing projects before year end. There will always be change and disorder. So it’s important is know how to restore equilibrium. That’s part of life and part of becoming better with age.
To help you rise above the chaos, let’s start with the most important tip: Give up trying to be Superwoman. Yes, you heard it here—it’s time to retire your cape!
Many women think they are supposed do it all on their own and perfectly, especially when their children are little. I know. I had a huge breast abscess and, ultimately, needed surgery, because I was trying to nurse my daughter exclusively while also working as hard—and as many nights—as the male doctors in my practice.
Trust me—you can’t give from an empty cup.
You also can’t function effectively without some structure, stress relief, or support! So I put together these helpful resources and tips:
- Are you experiencing “CHAOS: Can’t Have Anyone Over Syndrome?” Then check out the FlyLady’s suggestions for getting your home in order. The FlyLady has completely changed my life for the better since I adopted her shiny sink technique. (Click here to see a video.)
The FlyLady also recommends a 15-minute decluttering, and so do I! I learned long ago from my friend and Feng Shui expert Terah Kathryn Collins that moving (or tossing) 27 things can change your life. Set a timer and see how much you can accomplish. Donate to others what you don’t need.
- “What’s for dinner?” Those three words can cause angst in even the most composed woman. So check out Cooking for the Rushed, a Web site developed by Sandi Richard, a mother of seven. She developed “Eating Forward,” a system to drastically reduce the stress around feeding your family.
- Use the Cozi app for family organizing, including to-do and grocery lists, resources and phone numbers, a calendar with reminders, and a photo management tool. It’s free and brilliant!
- Take dance breaks. Put on your favorite tunes or radio station and dance for at least one song. It’s an instant mood enhancer and spiritual tune up.
- Emote. Set your timer for five minutes and weep, complain, vent, and throw things! Let it out! You have to feel it to heal it. And you can’t make yourself feel better if you are sitting on load of unexpressed anger or frustration or grief. Once you let it out, you’ll be amazed at how clear you’ll feel. And solutions to your problem will arise spontaneously!
- Ask for help! We really can’t get out of our own way when we’re faced with difficulty, because it’s impossible to see ourselves objectively. So have a group of close friends that you can call to talk things out. I call it a “placenta of power.”
Beware of “frenemies”—those people who claim to be your friend but are really more of an enemy. Often these are close family members (sad, but often true!), and it’s OK to guard yourself against their negative influence.
- Despite any enhanced pace, remember that within you is a deep wellspring of calm and peace. You can access this by taking a slow, deep breath through your nose. And then another. You can also close your eyes and focus on your heart.
- If a few of these tips sound familiar, it’s because I’ve shared some of them (in more depth) on my weekly radio show Flourish!on Hay House Radio. Tune in weekly for more ideas and support.
I encourage you to try some or all of these ideas and to leave me a comment to let me know what’s working and what else you would suggest. Like all new habits, the more you practice them, the easier they become. You’ll restore your inner peace and be thriving in no time.